It’s funny how you learn that there are different types of loneliness. Maybe it’s hearing it in the voice of a friend who is halfway around the world living the life he was meant to but having nobody there to bare witness to his success and failures, nobody that counts. Maybe it’s being in a city that you outgrew years ago and talking/ fucking girls you already know what they’ll say and how they’ll fuck. But you can’t leave yet because you promised yourself that you’d tell the world what happened here about the power and the loneliness. It’s like being trapped in a Dirty Beaches song.
It was time to go to the next spot the guys were getting restless. Man these young dudes energy can be on another level. At the next place they roamed upstairs and downstairs and talking to girls left and right. I kind of envied them for that, I remembered what it used to be like to be so hungry to fuck and game and pull as many chicks as possible. I went through the opening mass number of girls in one night and cold approaches. You can be the lion that chases the game or the alligator that waits for the prey to come get a drink. Patience. The truth is if you have good game it just takes one approach, one conversation, hell one right look and smile and you hit it out of the park. Of course there are night’s where you go the whole night and nothing happens, in this city you learn to become at peace with that. As many nights as I write about good times and hook ups, there are twice as many nights where nothing happens or approaches go no where.
I feel like tonight will probably be one of those nothing nights. With the encounter I had at our first spot in the back of my mind like a baby tumor. I post up upstairs with a drink and don’t bother to really hardcore approach anything. After a while a cute drunk girl talking to a young guy slight behind me on the other side of the barrier. it was obvious it was a pick up and she wasn’t “that” into the guy who was putting on all the moves. She kept looking at our group like she wanted someone to step up and say something and interrupt this other dude’s game, but I sure as hell don’t gas chicks heads up like that. I here,
Guy (slur): listen, I think you’re hot, give me a kiss
Her: I don’t know what kind of girls you’re used to dealing with in the Navel Academy but I don’t do that.
Guy: whatever, come on….
This went on for a while and mainly we watched out of the corner of our eye to see if she’d do it and she knew we were watching so she kept resisting drunk dude. Finally after the annoyance I ignored her and went back to scouting. Moments later the young pair was making out, typical. Her friend who was kissing on some other dude comes to check up on her. During this I get a text from a girl I used to see,
Her: What are you doing, where are you at… I miss you
(I tell her know)
Her; I’ll be right there
I turn to the girlfriend of the kissing couple and strike up a conversation. Innocent enough with flirty banter I try not to make it seem like an obvious pick up attempt. At the same time things are hurried because the guy who was all about her is lurking close by and I have something on the way. We quickly recap each others nights, the suit, her friend making out with a random and being drunk. I pull out my phone and take her number. When I look up I see the head of my ex in the line of the door way. two more digits to go, I don’t even bother getting her name, another number I’ll have to save as “Random (location of the bar)”. Just then her dude finds her and they move to the side.
My old girl is walking towards me like a South American missile. It’s like a fetish version of a Frank Miller character, a blur of blonde hair, red lips, big boobs and curves with heals making her over six feet. The way she smiles, happy to see me after so long. Even though I work trying to untangle our lives to separate and move on, after the night I’ve had she’s making a whole lot of sense. My boomerang girl, I’ve thrown her away twice and she keeps coming back. She’ll grow out of it eventually.
We kiss hello, she says high to the guys, we move to the bar. She asks me, “aren’t those the guys from Georgetown? How do you know them again”. I tell her don’t worry about it. She confesses that after this long there are things she knows I keep from her and she hates and loves that about me even more. The secret guys like us keep from good girls like her. I order some beers, we order more drinks, close my tab, then stumble out into the late night.
On our walk I tell her how the streets are never safe. I recount the story from a few years back of a Georgetown couple in this fancy neighborhood, I think the guy was Jewish and in politics or something. Rich neighborhood. Anyways one night while unloading groceries they were robbed and killed. The guy got his throat slit (thinking back not sure if both died or just him). But the news were outraged and shocked that something like that could happen in such a nice rich neighborhood, a senseless crime. My point was that this is DC, there’s no safety here, any given night anyone can get it. It doesn’t matter your pay grade, your neighborhood, or your race. It’s a desperate city. I stop talking and in my silence she holds on closer to my arm as we walk to her place.
At her one bedroom she goes into her closet to change. I take of my jacket and fold it so, then my shirt and pants and slide into her bed. She comes out in the leopard print nightie number. Wow is that new.Yeah I bought this one and another one for you but then you broke up with me and I haven’t had a chance to wear it so we’ll have to do this again. I can do that.
She crawls into bed, I get on top of her and kiss her on her lips, then on her neck. I pull down one strap off her shoulder exposing one of her breasts and move down. She whispers for me to go down on her. It’s a type of last chance sex or second to last chance sex. Familiar but you go through all the acts and positions like you’ll never see each other again, like the strangers you’ll someday become. Like you’ll see her again years from now in a random rooftop bar and you two will know each other and catch up on where your lives have taken you. And you’ll smile and nod but all you’ll be thinking about is this night, how she smelled, what she tasted like, how you fucked. She’ll have her Phd in Economics and there will be some guy with her watching you two and knowing in the back of his head that both of you have been together in another life. Maybe he’ll love her or think he does. But she’ll be happy with him and give him the “just one minute” look. We’ll hug and say goodbye and she’ll go to him and he’ll ask, “who was that”. And she’ll say, “just a guy I used to know”. And deep down you’ll hope she remembers this night and more.
- Created: 23-07-21
- Last Login: 23-07-21